So, I don’t normally post personal things on here, but people involved follow my main tumblr and it’s dumb but I’m really upset and I needed to get it out of my system.
I’ll put it under a read more so I don’t detract too much from Enj and R heaven =).
Basically two of my closest friends went to the Harry Potter Tour today, something that we have all said we would do together since it first opened. Not a word did I hear about this from either of them until one checked into the location on facebook this afternoon.
I was quite unpopular growing up and as a result I can be quite sensitive about being “left out”, and sometimes I know it isn’t justified so I try not to be upset. But this was something THEY KNEW I was desperate to do. It’s something I have put off doing with other people I’m not quite as close to, because I wanted to go with THEM because we all said we’d go together.
It just… I’ve been feeling really lonely recently. I live in London which means even my friends in the city live at least a 45 minute train journey away. My friends from outside are even further away and this tour is literally 30 minutes away from where I live… So it’s kind of painful to know that they were just half an hour away doing something without ever having asked me if I’d like to join them… and now one of them is posting pictures all over facebook and it just… it really hurts that they never ever thought to so much as let me know they were going even though we were literally talking about Harry Potter all week with the Cursed Child coming out.
Now… There are potentially several reasons why it might not have been possible for me to go. I’m assuming the tickets were a birthday present from someone to one of them, whose birthday was last month, and they only bought three (one for her, one for her husband and one for a friend), but the fact that they kept it from me is still really hurtful… like as if they thought I would get mad or wouldn’t understand or hell, worse, that they didn’t think of me at all or consider that I might be upset that I won’t get to experience it with them – at least not in the same way because they will have already seen it.
It just seems really weird that they wouldn’t say ANYTHING. Which suggests they knew I would be upset but didn’t consider how finding out seperate to them telling me in person would feel for me.
I’ve had such a rubbish two weeks recently – my job is possibly going to be transferred to a company I have no desire to work for or I could just quit and be unemployed (also not fun) – so on top of that this just caught me at a really bad time and I feel so unwanted and like even the people who are supposed to care about me and trust me either don’t want me around or don’t trust me to respond well to honesty (ironic since I’m a massive Hufflepuff).